Xibalbah curled lazily around the tree trunk, relishing the roughness of the bark and its slow scratching of her pelt. Being back in the swamp was a coming home on so many levels, and Xi finally felt her soul mending as her body was healing. She allowed herself to linger on this simple pleasure, lost deep in thought amidst the green mist so reminiscent of the Emerald Dream itself.
Not long ago, she had been trapped in a never-ending nightmare. Stonard was lost, Chaoseater was lost, and Xibalbah had stood motionless on the Rift of Aln, reliving the worst moments of her life, trapped by the Emerald Dream’s nightmare corruption.
She knew each minute, each second, of each failure intimately from every angle, from every “if only.” That was the easy part. So familiar in their rehearsal, such images came as almost a comfort, a reminder of all the sleepless nights she’d spent in the real world inflicting the same torture upon herself, each scene like an old friend come to tether her to reality.
No, this barrage of images was not the way to tap into Xibalbah’s weaknesses. Such visions only made her stronger, more resolved, more determined to escape the nightmare cycle that rendered her impotent and useless.
Little had she known that was exactly the point and she was playing her part perfectly. The more she struggled against her own powerlessness, the tighter the nightmare’s grip became. Xibalbah had no problem reliving her failures, taking responsibility even beyond what was reasonable, doing everything in her power to set things right.
Everything in her power.
That was it, really, the weakness that the nightmare was exploiting: Xibalbah’s intense drive to exert control over her world. The knowledge that she was stuck there, motionless, unable to help her clan, her world, herself even, was the dark force holding her in that place, and the more she struggled against her own powerlessness, the more she fueled the bonds that bound her.
There was nothing within Xibalbah’s power. Power itself was a mere illusion that could be turned to either dream or nightmare, light or dark, with the mere seed of a thought—the mere seed of a dream. So simple, so elegantly easy, and so devastatingly effective.
Xibalbah still couldn’t pinpoint when she’d stopped struggling, when she had simply surrendered to the truth of her own powerlessness. Indeed, she had trouble recalling much of anything as time held such little meaning within the Dream, where days, weeks, months blurred into one. What she did know was that her dreams had gradually started to change, almost imperceptibly at first, to become more accepting, less resistant. And as her dreams changed, so too did Xi.